Sunday, October 23, 2005

Bat.



Hot. I increased the power of the fan finishing my second glass of water in the last thirty minutes. It got dark, but even the velvety blackness of the night didn`t seem to bring any relief. Sitting by the desk lit only by a fluorescent light of the computer screen I could hear a humming sound of an air conditioning in the neighbour`s flat. So quiet.
I was working on my new post when I caught a sight of movement out of the corner of my eye. There was something black on the floor crawling clumsily. Ah, a bat... "Hey little fellow, lost? My flat is the last place you would like to be in. And, by the way, didn`t I see you here two days ago?" I remembered a similar incident that happened recently. Hummmm...
Some new idea came to my mind and ignoring the bat I returned to the computer to feed it with fresh thoughts. For some time I was completely absorbed by my work forgetting completely the world around. Having finished typing I stood up with the intention of bringing another glass of water and then I fell back on my chair surprised with the view of the bat. He was still there cuddling his wings close to his small black body. A mouse with wings. Very black, very misterious.
"It`s high time I set you free" I thought.
"Not to worry!" I heard suddenly "I`m here because of my own will".
Wow! Now I was completely incapable of lifting myself from the chair. "Am I getting crazy? Too much work? Hunted house?" Thoughts were running through my mind.
"Listen" I heard again "Get a grip. It`s me, the black mouse with wings..." sarcastic sigh got into my ears. "By the way - I didn`t deserve to be insulted."
I was staring at my guest with disbelief. That`s a bit too much for me. A bat talking and reading my mind? Me considering the idea of hearing it and the will to respond? That`s not what I had in mind staying home alone to let my imagination work on some new ideas. The last thing I would do was talking to a bat! How ridiculous it sounded, anyway. But there he was. Almost still, black spot on the floor. I was about to say something but I gave up. My brain was like a big hard knot, completely flabergasted at the happening situation. For some time none of us made a sound. He, not sure whether speaking to me was a good idea and I, not sure of my sanity.
It was him who decided to break the silence. "I`m going to tell you something, but don`t rack your brain too much on it, ok? Keep your mind open". He moved a bit forward. "The bat is just a form I took. It`s me, well... you... Huh...What I really want to say - I am you in another parallel world."
It took me about few minutes to digest the speech and decide whether I should react or ignore what was happening. As crazy as I could be I finally managed to say something. " Ok, you are me. I am a bat in a parallel world."
" Not exactly. I am you , you are not a bat. I couldn`t just appear in my own shape here, first of all, not to scare you to death, second of all because to cross the parallel world I had to be smaller. A bat is a perfect disguise, isn`t it?" He looked at me obviously proud of himself. "But why are you here? What are you doing there? How come there is another world?" The questions poured out of my mouth.
"Well, I can`t tell you too much, but... I`ve been coming here already few times to see you. I picked some sadness that you`ve been feeling. It usually doesn`t happen, but there`s some strong connection between us. Something must have happened between the worlds and there have been cracks allowing our two forms connect mentally. All what you feel is a part of my feelings too. I wanted to talk to you about it before, but you were never alone."
"Yeah" I admitted sadly "Never alone. So, go on..."
"My dear, your feelings are... hummm... influencing me too much. I have no reason to feel miserable, but now thanks to you, I do. I know, it`s not what I feel, they are your feelings, but it is strong enough to bother me."
"Ow, I`m sorry. I had no intention to butt in the way you feel. You know, it`s not up to me after all. I want to be happy, it`s just... the circumstances aren`t making it easy." I started getting used to the idea of talking to the bat. At the end of the day, there are things that philosophers didn`t dream about.
"Listen, happiness is not only what you receive. It`s what you believe in, what you have to look for too. There are no good Samaritans in any world - not even in mine. Nobody here or there lives just with a purpose of making others happy. You have to understand, this feeling is a state of mind. Your mind that you`re in control of. You have to go after what makes you feel happy. Nobody will give it to you prepared and packed nicely like a christmas present. Learn how to look at things, appreciate what you have around and if it still doesn`t satisfy you - look for things that do. Try to get them and once you do, make sure you`ll never let them go."
The bat got silent, as if giving me time to chew on what he said. Was I that passive? Living and expecting things to happen? Waiting for the happiness to come and knock on my door? Such a simple and obvious truth.
"There are good Samaritans" I thought looking at the bat. " He came to me just to make me realize that simple fact."
My guest looked at me, smirked and said " By the way, talking to you wasn`t the main reason of coming here. Do you think there would be a chance for me to check my mail?"